False Reading (Poetry)

I’m too old for longing
it’s too late to care
regret’s slow in coming
when facts are laid bare

If I could remember
the bad things I’ve done
I’d turn a leaf over
and rethink each one

I may have been foolish
in naive disguise
I broke bread with sinners
and swallowed sweet lies

I followed blind fashion
my collar turned up
so eager my passion
I gulped a full cup

Life could have been better
love blew me off course
and the old fortune teller’s
prediction proved false

No luck on the horses
no house by the sea
though it could have been worse
we get by — him and me

So why do I ponder —
why not just let go?
all reason goes under
to vanish below

The chances slipped by me
I guessed all along
fickle fate would deny me
the tarot was wrong