Spoiling The Whiteness (Poetry)

There are lines across the paper
matching wrinkles on my brow
winter’s skin is dark with thread veins
so you wouldn’t know me now

How I long to travel backwards
to the lands where I was young
when the nights were more forgiving
and the pain had not begun

Lately fog outside the window
presses hard against my heart
and I can’t remember faces
as they queue up to depart

I’ve an emptiness that’s larger
than this shrinking life can fill
and the darkness makes me childlike
so I leave the light on still

All this ink that spoils white paper
maps the shape of longing now
forgetfulness will fade the contours
soothes my ever-anxious brow

Thus I find myself protesting
every part of me’s grown numb
sorrow slows the circulation
dams the blood so words won’t come